We all have a love deficit. Love isn’t received from some important people in our development or it’s twisted in some way. Even though it’s human and emotional love that we don’t get, by the time we choose to do something about it, it’s an entirely different love that can open up and become available. There are several forms of love.

Good love from human sources is vital to a healthy psychology. Emotional love is part of our composition. A partner’s love can be refuge. These are aspects of love that are real and valuable.

These types of love must co-exist with other forms of love. One such form is self-love.

It’s a powerful journey, to find the love you weren’t given within yourself, and share it with all parts of you that didn’t receive love from a human counterpart, at whatever time in the past.

Love is there, inside you. It may be a little worn or rebellious, but it’s there. The other idea to get used to is to share this love with yourself!

When we feel we want to give love, it’s always to another, outside of ourselves. This is the accepted flow of love. Outward.

The person who needs the most love is you.

Feel that first. Drop all your armor and feel.

Feel and notice the love deficit. This introspection can also reveal how you haven’t loved yourself well at times. This is usually tangled up with the love not available from significant people.

The only important thing is to feel and accept that you need love.

Then the journey of sourcing love for yourself can begin. Be joyous about that! It’s to be celebrated.


The Essential Lesson of Self-Love

Hajime Namiki, Night of Stars and Comets, 2005

Making healthy self-love a lifelong remembrance and application leads to healing through many layers.

This makes is easier to grasp that there’s a beautiful form of love that’s universal. This love is never sourced from the personal. People you know may display this type of love, but its source is universal.

Universal love is all-present, ever-accessible, ready to flood your life experiences and provide a view from the peak to reframe how you see things, to give major support, to help you leave the struggles of the little “I” even momentarily, so you can find the substantial resources and gifts hiding within your own being.

We know this love exists because our design, our human being is such that we can feel it and wield it. We also witness and can ourselves be the source of its other faces: kindness, empathy, understanding, forgiveness, compassion.

We’re a many-layered being. Sourcing love locally, in the microcosm of human life has limitations. The expanse of love that’s available to us is wasted if we don’t explore this expanse, move our being into it and chart our way through love’s wonderful, ever-unfolding dimension.

This is the realm of healing, beauty, light, serenity, silence and ultimate connection to life, nature and cosmos.

The fullness of love is the sanctuary we seek.

Love flows. Love doesn’t know boundaries. The mind creates boundaries. The mind creates the boundary of separate me and you.

— Ram Dass


Love’s Depth and Breadth

The Space of Being

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The Deficit of Love