The essential lesson of self-love is that it never ends. Not the lesson. That would be tedious. For some, yes, the lesson can return again and again.

The essential lesson of self-love is simply to never stop practicing it, applying it in every situation life may present.

There’s a whole journey prior to getting to the point where it’s now only a matter of remembering to love yourself and keeping it fresh. That remembrance isn’t all that easy. It’s a journey of its own.

But it’s a journey at a more mature phase of self-love.

The first call of self-love is that it’s real, a resource we can turn to, need to turn to, and it has been dropping many hints all along, alerting you to its availability.

The hints can be painful. We learn through pain. This can continue a while. It really depends how much attention you’re paying.

How much you’re wrapped up, in being whatever version of yourself you’re being, at the any given time.

All versions of you come with a self-love unit. And the necessity to plug it in!

This isn’t negotiable. And why would it be?

Healthy self-love, a wholesome relationship with oneself, no matter the raggedy edges of personal history, is there for the asking. When you finally do it’s:

  • life giving
  • healing
  • promotes mindbody wellness
  • builds resilience
  • a layer of support

Recognize that your real security is built from your relationship with your own heart.

— Sara Paddison

The idea of love can be scary, oddly enough. Love is a sort of nakedness and this is somehow difficult for us. The opening creates fear. It feels risky. So we don’t.

And its costs us. Sour moods. Emotional upset. Mind fog. Physical blahs.

But this isn’t another guilt-trip. Anything but.

It’s simply heart-forward.

You give your heart the lead when it comes to matters of self-care.

Because if you listen to your head it’s not going to prioritize care time, soft time, open time, timeless time.

Timeless time is a must because the clock is so rigid.

If you are dealing with fears and insecurities from old head programs, have compassion for yourself.

— Sara Paddison

Alexander Calder, American, Ballons Dans la Pluie 1965
(Balloons In the Rain)

The giving of ‘love’ to oneself doesn’t always have to come from yourself.

From routine personal care and pampering to investing in yourself with a series of Reiki sessions, sometimes it’s not only possible, but necessary to honor self-love in the form of services you receive.

There are hurdles here too. Spending reasonable amounts of money on services you trust and have benefited from would be normal and smart. Yet, this avenue can be ignored or made unimportant because you’re not a priority in your own life. Yet.

Making yourself, your own care a priority isn’t a selfish act. It’s a sane act!

And you’re the only one who can initiate the big onrush of benefits. You say yes! to loving yourself and allow yourself to receive in all its forms.

Self-love is the springboard from which you continue to serve all the people and areas of your life that need you, in a balanced, strong and healthy way.

Otherwise the demands of life, which don’t stop, still have to attended to, but you do so increasingly from a deeply compromised place.

And it turns into a vicious cycle.

It really doesn’t have to.

Self-love is what is.

It’s there already, waiting for you to show up. Once you do, the process immediately engages, the resource holds you afloat.

When you surrender your head to your heart, you allow your heart to give you a wider, higher intelligence perspective.

— Sara Paddison

Be loyal to yourself. No matter how long the to-do list is. Prioritize your care.

We’re always loyal to everything else on the list first. We fit in or ignore our own needs.


Each post for the Reiki Help Blog can take up to 7 days to write/research, proofread/edit, and post with an appropriate image and formatting. If you leave this space with any value, knowledge, joy or understanding, please consider making a donation of your choice.

Sustaining member with recurring monthly donation:




One-time patron:


About Pamir Kiciman

Teacher of Reiki Classes in the original tradition and Japanese teachings of Mikao Usui (Sensei) in South Florida. Meditation, Healing, and Spirituality training and services.
The Essential Lesson of Self-Love